Chasing a dream

So many of us were asked as kids what it was we desired to be when we became grown. Like many of you, I had lofty expectations and dreams, which at the time seemed easily attainable. I am not sure if the line where one becomes grown is a bit unclear, or perhaps my ambitions (while courageous) were beyond my reach; the reality that unfolded did not look like the dreams I had as a child.

I had dreams of being a baseball star with the glove and swagger of “the kid” Ken Griffey Jr. My free time as a young boy was voraciously consumed with the crimson stitched, white rawhide sphere, sunflower seeds, and backwards New Era fitted hat, the starter kit for the cul de sac diamond. My intro into business economics was berthed over Upper Deck and Topps rarities and a Beckett price guide. To say that I dreamed of becoming a baseball player would be a lie, I was already one who just wasn’t famous yet.

Life doesn’t have a set course, nothing makes complete sense, and yet somehow we are supposed to navigate it fearlessly, head up, and accepting of the challenges we encounter. I am not sure if I am defective or not, but that just isn’t easy. To be clear, I know I am not defective, in fact I find that I am rather driven and battle tested in ways that give me some hope in tough times. However, the journey remains a worthy opponent; strategically providing opposition to mold us to be a better version of ourselves.

One day at a time I am given the chance to make myself a better version of the man I was yesterday. Outside of this, I have absolutely ZERO control or influence. It is my responsibility to give a compliment where I can, lend a listening ear to a troubled friend or loved one, call that someone to remind them that I miss them, stand up for myself when I am disrespected, and at all costs love myself. Outside of the current moment lies the future or past, each of which is but a dream.

Despite the fact that I have not signed a MLB contract, I still have to grow. Despite my dreams not materializing, I still have a desire to push on and become the man I am destined to be. Anything lost can be found again except time wasted. Vision without action is merely a dream, and I’m not interested in wasting time or dreaming my life away. Today is a new day!

6 thoughts on “Chasing a dream

  1. This is a masterpiece of writing! Brilliant, are inspiring and earth shaking when it comes to my life and I look back on it! Thank you for bringing it all to ahead for me. And thank you for recognizing the incredible man that you have become and have yet to be! You are exceptionally Talented and it makes my heart ever so happy to see that it’s all coming to fruition for you! It won’t be long before your name is on that Best seller!

    >

    Liked by 2 people

  2. I wanted to be a singer, but because I lacked confidence and support I never pushed myself to explore those avenues. I had my last performance as a senior in high school choir. My only consolation is knowing that had I become immensely successful in music, I would have lost a lot of privacy that I value. Our society places such a strong emphasis on being “happy” and although I have accomplished a lot and overcome a lot of personal hurdles, my mind lingers in the realm of the “what-ifs”. I wouldn’t say it’s a state of regret because I like what I have now and besides, I am where I am and there’s no benefit to hating the journey. I use this mindfulness as the fuel to push me forward in the world I am now, knowing that allowing my self doubts to get in the way will only create more lamentations of the what-ifs. Realistically, I have little control over anything, except for how I react to things and it isn’t practical to simply overhaul my life. I focus more on being content rather than happy, as studies suggest that happiness is more linked to the constitution of a person, rather than circumstances. Personally, I have always wanted and expected more. This may have its dark side, but if this trait is used well, it can help create contentment for oneself. For me it’s a matter of effort and perspective taking. Glad to see what you’re up to Brandon. Keep it up!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. That was beautiful insight. We are all connected by experiences in one way or another. To hear your insight is reassuring that I’m not alone in my battles. Thank you for your words!

      Like

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.